Tha Foolsbumps Issue #MarchIssue

#Foolsbumps: the all new book series calling out the fools, goofs & goobers of the day!

Pony Up, Daddy! The End of the American Father

It's been a rough road for the American dad. From their portrayal in commercials since commercials existed, to being walked all over in every HGTV reality show where he's forced into living in a Tiny House, or choosing between identical paint swatches, the USA Daddy has been dragged into his role as the castrated fool. Dads don't…

The Day America Elected a Frog

Let's get one thing straight. Most of America doesn't vote; so before you gloat about "America wanted Trump" or "It appears Clinton won the popular vote, so clearly America wanted Clinton," understand the the vast majority of the country didn't give a fuck about either candidate; or at least not enough to push a button.…

The Other Side of the Olympics

I'll say it so you don't have to: The Olympics are fucking boring. Yes, I recognize the athletic achievement and national pride (blah blah blah) that go along with this ancient sporting event, but it sucks. It's not fun to watch and it's even less fun to hear people talk about. That's right--Americans don't give…

An Open Letter to Country Star John Rich

Dear Mr. Rich, It may seem odd, and almost awkward, to single you out amongst the perversely immense cacophony of Country Western Superstars and the fine and objectively upstanding, God-Loving American Citizens who enjoy the genre. Let me assure you that my intentions are specific and wholly warranted. While your career has had its ups…